"Chuck Norris wants you as an extra in an episode of Walker Texas Rangers and made you have the script at home, safe that in the name of the ancient friendship which binds you do not decline the invitation. Law, while distracted by the technical comments of Miss Wet T-shirt 2009, you realize that the party is rather difficult and dangerous: you have to play the brother of Cordell Walker who died in Viet-nam during an exotic holiday in 1941.
According to the script, the famous Ranger starring Chuck Norris does not recognize at first (many years have passed since I put his fingers in the eyes) and even swap you for one of the brothers Dalton Lucky Luke and fills the barrel. Only after a short but painful (you have no stand-in) hospital course good ranger will understand who you are (how you hold the jug of beer) and welcomes you to his family, permettendovi di guidare qualche volta il suo pick-up, ma solo sul vialetto di casa. Nel finale di puntata, in un simpatico siparietto, il ranger Trivette perderà sei denti per dimostrare che il vostro calcio rotante è senza dubbio inferiore a quello dell’amico Walker."
Ovviamente siete preoccupati, vorreste volatilizzarvi, ma non potete (non quando avete a che fare con Chuck Norris!), l’unica cosa che potete fare è modificare il copione creando dei diversivi ad hoc durante la diretta della puntata (sono in diretta vero? :)). Per farlo avete bisogno di tre oggetti di sicuro effetto: un cappello di paglia, un piatto di stufato di stambecco e un simpatico opossum.
A- It is hard ... mooooolto dura... immediatamente penso al daffarsi. Cercare di impressionare Chuck Norris dicendogli "Hey ragazzo, tu sarai anche Chuck Norris, ma io sono McGyver !". ... no no ... questa no, direi che mi varebbe un calcio rotante in bocca. Ma io sono pur sempre Mc Gyver, e con gli oggetti a disposizione ho gia pensato a come sistemar capra e cavoli. Col mio iper-tecnosuper-cazzolato-spia-detector, sbircio dalla distanza nel diario di Chuck Norris, e scopro quanto avevo sperato ! Scopro che il primo rapposto sessuale dell' attore, è stato all' età di 6 anni, mentre rincorreva il suo opossum fuggito, grazie ad una bella contadina intenta a preparare il pranzo all' aperto. Io con semplicissima mossa, non ho fatto altro che accettare il copione, se nonchè to 'start shooting,' s agreement with the crew, director, and Trivette, we did find a chair near the opossum Chuck, who just the 'saw tried to take him to stroke in memory of the good old infants. As expected, we did run the 'possum in the direction of Miss Universe who was wearing the straw hat, and has accepted Chuck Norris with a huge smile while caressing persos an ibex in the study.
Chuck Norris immediately struck in the memory, he forgot the script, got the girl, then cooked the ibex and finally prepared the stew that had the flavor of ancient times, only to return the girl, repeatedly, until we managed to finish the shooting bet. Result, Chuck Norris has not angry with me for the joke have, by permission of trying the pleasure of his nostalgic first time, Trivette owes me a favor to life for 6 teeth and I saved the 'no doubt have shown a taste' other times my superior skills (sent from Skahmmy) .
B- begin! Definitely Chuck Norris sent me this script to kill in order to reiterate the fact that Chuck Norris has no friends. How to survive until the end of the episode? In the script there 'a note that tells me that if there were to be all that is written will come calciorotato. Panic! After a chamomile I start to think.
From the fact that exchanging for one of the Dalton brothers drum fills me conclude that Walker hates them, so a few minutes before the shoot I went to Chuck Norris and the Board to add a particular script (stating that it is the work of the authors, not his, then changed): to be more satisfied with the humiliation of his eternal enemy, the ranger arrest me on charges of being an anti-ChuckNorrista, ensuring their survival at least until the hospital scene ( to arrest me I must stay alive, no?). Furthermore, in the name of friendship that prompted me to accept the script, I ask that in the scene where Chuck Norris is in the hospital to give me another pair of kicks I be served my favorite dish, a stew of wild goat, so let me go through and ask for a beer to swallow the boccone.Chuck Norris agrees, a little 'sorry to not have to calciorotare (believed I was there to reject that part).
started shooting, but I immediately rises a question: how to make me stop? I see Chuck Norris then meet me and I understand: wear a different hat than the one ranger in his presence will surely be an act of heresy!
So I pull out a typical straw hat from Vietnam that I find at hand and I put it in my head. Everything goes as planned. I am filled with barrels, but survive to be arrested. As I served stew stambeccofingo of choking: Walker promptly, to prevent my death from natural causes and not done for kicks rotating hands me his beer pocket one-liter (keeps it in his shirt pocket). Start to drink and be recognized as the brother of Walker.
While parking the pickup in the driveway after the tour, I remember one thing: Trivette must lose six teeth! What to do?
Walker propose to make us a beer: he puts the leash Trivette and together we go to the bar. While we drink, I let go of the opossum, half dead with thirst for never having drunk when I picked up from its habitat. Obviously goes to the nearest glass of beer, my. I'll take it by the tail and threw it out the window. Trivette exclaims: "You're not his brother would have used a rotating football." In response, I make him drop the six teeth.
They say those who try to fool Chuck Norris to die before you even finish his last sentence, but obviously it is only a law ... (sent from Artemis_fowljr)
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